The Chiropractor (Sequel to The Event and the Quest)

Not the best of sequels… much like Transformers 2 was to Transformers 1.

The next morning (7am) I went to see the Chiropractor. I ambled down my street, it wasn’t a pretty walk, took a right where it cuts Queen Street and walked 3 minutes. Three minutes shouldn’t be a long time… but it was.

I pre-assessed myself on [insert name of well-known medical website with built-in symptom checker]… and lo and behold, I either had a cold or spinal tumor. [insert name of well know medical website with built-in symptom checker] really does cover some landscape…some help that was…

I think I was the first appointment of the day and didn’t have to wait long to see the Doctor.

An assessment was done and it was determined that there was no issue with a nerve or disc or sciatic stuff. Phew…

What I did find out was that my left hip flexor was shorter and tighter than my right one. This is largely based on poor posture, terrible seating habits, long periods in a chair in front of a computer and no exercise. To be clear, I would rank the no exercise as the leading contributor.

I had no idea that the stuff on the inside could get so out of kilter… it’s not like that with the outside stuff. I’m right-handed and it’s not like one hand is freakishly smaller than the other one.I guess maybe that’s the way it works with eyes… but are eyes considered inside stuff or outside stuff… or maybe they’re a hybrid.

Back to the back. So why all the pain and the locking of the back? Well when the flexor shortens, the lower back tends to straighten to compensate. Like a domino effect, other things that shouldn’t happen, start to… and some major nerve somewhere gets messed up, making movement near impossible. Slamming down the car hood sprained the lower back and there was inflammation somewhere around L5… you can refer to the diagram here:

Yellow and Green make ouch

The way Doc explained it, there was that not one single massive event that really triggered the issue… it would have happened doing something else (like tying my shoes or taking my laptop out of its docking station).  It was a case of drops in a bucket eventually overflowing. It kind of reminds me of century club (the drinking contest)… it’s not the first 10 or 20 shots that get you… it’s shot 46.  I’ve grown to resent that you only use that saying (drops in a bucket) when bad things happen. I also hate “Death by 1000 paper cuts”… after 17 paper, I’d likely want to be put out of my misery. Why is the gold standard for paper cut death 1000?

Anywhoo…Doc prescribed some rest and other stuff to manage the inflammation. I ended up working from home. I went back every day that week. Three times the following week and now I’m down to twice a week. Doc gave me a sheet of stretches I have to do as homework. Back is better… still a little stiff. I could likely stop here… continue the stretches and assume that the flexor could get to a desired state. If that were the case, the blog would be called “DumoGoesToChiropractor” and would not be that interesting to write about. It might be tweet-worthy but definitely not blog-worthy. There is madness and a rant behind my reasoning and I’ll post it next time.


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